SUFC 0 DONCOPPINGER 3
First game of 2016 and Fish Walsh and Jerri Prawniwell report from a blowy Roots Hall. RaeGun in for Wozza is the only change after the MillYawn thumping, against the imaginatively nicknamed “Rovers”.
First half and Blues win the toss! Doncy line up with bloody Coppinger. A couple of Doncy corners, a Bents save, header just over. Not a great start for Blues, and still a bit slack at the back, and that’s just Fish Walsh. Crooner Andy Williams making Blues fans blue, along with old Copperbollocks. Blues looking flat, not even a shot on goal after 30 mins. Heavy rain showers affecting Blues players haircuts. Thommo looking MOTM, which he gets after our defeats, ooer! Digger Deegan exercising his hotpants like a caged animal. He wants feeding. 35 mins and Blues get a corner and Payney gets a shot on target! Keeper ferrets it away. Early sub Big Willy off, Wozza on. But Williams scores for Dunky on 43 mins, good goal 0-1. Nervy time but 4 corners to Blues, RaeGun forces save. Halftime 0-1.
Second half and Dunky clatter the post straight away, WAKE UP BLUES! Digger on for RaeGun, how long before he’s booked. Doncey 2-0 thru centre back Tailup. Bad defending again. Then Bents and Thommo cock-up and Dunky penalty! Tyson 0-3 WTF. Midfield have gone missing. Not another 0-4 surely. And don’t call me Shirley. Ball across, Hunty misses from 5 yards! Pig on for Mooney, will it help? Blues try hard and make a couple of chances. Copperminger off, thinks “can he play Blues every week?” Hunty freekick wasted, Dunky playing it out. Blues impotent, Viagra required. More crosses going in, Payney shoots wide and that’s it. 0-7 in two home games.
Full time 0-3, Bloody Neil Harris.